Thankful....Day4

Autumn--I'm thankful for the girls. (Autumn is a girl with not a lot of words)

Trinity--I'm thankful for my camera.  I really am.  I get to look at the world through a whole new perspective behind that lens.  It is amazing to me to be able to freeze time and totally capture that one moment in time.  I love it!  I also love that my camera has given me so many opportunities...opportunities to meet people, to get to know people, and totally connect with people that I would otherwise not be able to.  Yes, I am thankful for that camera!

M--I'm thankful I get to go to basketball practice tonight and I get to go to computers today at school.

A--I'm thankful for the new girl at school.  (She went on to explain the girls' heartbreaking situation...I'm thankful that A is sensitive and caring...she thinks about other people and I pray she can be there for this new girl!)

S--I'm thankful that I get to go to school, and for my family, and I get to eat at school!

H--I'm thankful M gets to go to basketball practice,   I'm also thankful I get to see my friends.

Thankful...Day 3

M--I'm thankful we get to eat at school this morning.

H--I'm thankful I get to go to basketball practice tonight!

A--hmmm....my family...and God.

S--My family...cause they take me to church.

Autumn--I'm thankful for a peaceful morning so far!

Trinity--I am thankful for Autumn.  It is my day off today, so instead of making me get up to get the girls ready, she just does it.  Seriously.  I'm pretty sure I get a lot of credit for things she does a lot of times.  I'm pretty sure people have no idea how much she does behind the scenes.  I'm thankful for her!

Thankful...Day 1 and 2

People have been playing this little game on facebook where they post each day of the month of November what they are thankful for.  I thought I would not only play on facebook, but I would get my girlies involved and play on here too...and maybe it will get me in the habit of posting everyday!  Here we go...day 1 and 2:
(Please remember as you read these that I asked them for these in the van on the way to school...not all girls were in a great mood...just know that).

Trinity--I am thankful for the hugs I get from four little girls, for with each hug my heart is filled.  And with each hug, I thank the LORD that he chose Autumn and I to get those four blessings!  I love them so!

M-I am thankful for having my first basketball practice last night!  It was awesome and I'm glad I get to play!

H-I'm glad I get to go to school.  Not all kids do.

A-God (can you tell who was in a bad mood?)

S-I'm thankful for my family.

Trinity--I'm thankful for coffee.  I know it sounds shallow, but I really do love it.  (Remember we were on our way to school with some not-so-happy children...yes I sucked that coffee down.)  I am very thankful that I can buy my favorite kind of coffee for no reason, and I love my coffeemaker, and it is kind of sad that I can write so much about coffee!  boo.

Autumn--I'm thankful for the weather cooling down.  I like the cooler days.

M--I'm thankful we get to go to church tonight.  I like church and its good we get to go.

H--I'm thankful for the kids that will get all the prizes and that they get to get all of that stuff. (Our church is participating in Operation Christmas Child and trying to get enough stuff for 100 boxes!)

A--Black people  (I asked to clarify, and yes, she is thankful for black people...she likes them and likes their skin.)

S--I'm thankful we get to go to church, and play when we get there, and go to school, and come home, and....(I lost everything else she was saying...it was along the same lines, but we had an unhappy camper, one trying to practice spelling, and she was close to getting dropped off at school...sorry S.  It was a long list though!)

Have a happy day!  Hope you enjoy the thankful game...I'm pretty sure we will look back at this and be thankful we played the game!

Lessons I've learned from the J-man

This blog is about my crazy journey through life...the ups, downs, and definitely funny things that happen along the way.  Today is a little different.  I want you to meet J. 

 J just turned 11 and I have had him in children's ministry the whole time (boo, this is his last year!)  J is pretty much a celebrity in our quaint little town, and as you read this post you will realize why.  J was born with achondraplasia, which means he is a little person.  Before you say, "Aww, poor guy," just read the rest of the post...you won't be feeling sorry for this fella for long.  Being a dwarf has caused a lot of obstacles both physically and emotionally, but J has not only overcome many obstacles, he has taught so many along the way.  I want to share with you some of the lessons I have learned from my little J-man!

1-Life is not fair, but God is sovereign.  No...life isn't fair.  It isn't fair that J has had to endure 16 or more surgeries ( I forget how many exactly there have been).  It isn't fair that his back hurts consistently.  It isn't fair that his neck hurts because he has to look up all the time.  It isn't fair that people are rude out of ignorance.  It isn't fair that he can't physically keep up with the other kids in playing.  It isn't fair.  Well, that is what we (all of those who know and love J) think.  J, on the other hand, chooses to embrace who he is.  He chooses to remember that those people who say rude things just don't realize it hurts his feelings.  He chooses to remember that God CHOSE to make him like he is, and though things are difficult, there are so many blessings and opportunities that come from our hard times.  J doesn't get upset that he can't see over a big crowd, he just uses his extra space down there to zip right through a crowd like a superhero without ever being noticed!  Now, he is a kid and he is human, so yeah, he gets discouraged, but the difference is, he does not stay in that place.  He chooses to move on.  To see this fella praise the Lord in his hard circumstances brings me to my knees.

 2-Be patient, the world doesn't revolve around you.  Not only is J a little person, but he is also the youngest of four siblings.  Yes, our whole town knows J and caters to his every want (you should have seen his hospital room after a surgery just because he said all he wanted were balloons...I forget how many he had, but I'm pretty sure it was well over 50!), but again, he has 3 older siblings who are very involved in every activity under the sun, which means J has to just be patient.  Now, I know that ever kid has to learn to be patient.  It is a part of life we just have to learn at some point.  However, when you are a little person and just need a little more help (he needs much much less help than he used to of course), people sometimes forget, and patience is needed.  Yes, I have seen J yell at his family, but it was only used to be heard.  It is hard to be patient and I have seen him display it wonderfully.

 3-Be a good friend.  There have been times when I have seen J discouraged with his friends.  Now, J's friends are wonderful to him.  They help him, yet treat him like a regular guy.  However, because none of us have been in J's shoes, we just don't know what it is like to see your friends run outside and not realize you can't keep up.  We can't understand how it feels fully to notice people who don't know you staring and trying to figure you out.  We just don't understand.  Now, I want you to hear my heart in this.  I am in no way saying that J's friends have done anything wrong at all...they are great friends.,.I am always so encouraged to see them with him.  I just know that when I get left out accidentally or purposefully, when people talk about me, or when I get my feelings hurt, I may not be as gracious as I have seen J be.  He is a great friend!

Oh, and the picture below...that is not snot coming out of his nose...it is some weird lighting with the photo...my fault.

 I am so thankful that M and J are such good friends.  It sometimes brings tears to my eyes to think of the difficult things both of these kiddos have been through and how both have overcome so many trials!  I am blessed!

 4-It is ok to ask for help.  I sometimes have a hard time asking for help.  I would just rather do it myself than ask for help.  I don't know if it is pride, or not wanting to bother people, or maybe a little of both, but J is a great example of graciously and kindly asking for help.

As you can see in the picture, he also has no problem beating his friends up!  Hahaha.

 5-Like who you are.  Sometimes I have a hard time liking who I am.  I play the comparing game way too much.  I think things like, "I wish I could take pictures like________.  I wish I was quiet and gentle like ______.  I wish I had it together like ______.  I wish I was patient with my kids like _____."  Those thoughts that are quick to come to my mind can be so destructive if I choose to let them.  J could find reasons to wish he was different than he is, but this is a conversation I recently had with him in Sunday School:
Me: What is one thing you would change about your family...if you could change anything at all?
J:  I would make them all small like me.  It hurts my neck to look at them all.
Me:  You would make them small?  If you had a choice, would you make them small or make you tall?
J:  I would make them small cause it hurts my neck.  I like being small.  It's fun to be different.  And when I am in a big crowd, I can get where I want to go faster than anybody!

Good point J...like who you are!

 6-Don't give up...keep going and find a way.  Obviously there are physical obstacles to overcome in the little, everyday tasks, and while J is good about receiving help, he is also very independent and has a drive to do things on his own.  He has great endurance for sure!  I'm pretty sure I might play into my weaknesses and get all the help I can, but he doesn't.  Yes, he is in pain, but he keeps going.  He can whip around on his bike faster than some kids his age.  He doesn't not give excuses.  Things are often a lot tougher for him and he has to work a lot harder, but he doesn't give up!  Recently, I was in his house for something, and he wanted a drink of Sprite.  Instead of asking for one from one of the 3 adults standing there, he got the sprite out, then did his tricky climb onto the counter, reached up high, got his cup, did his tricky decline, and got his drink.  You might think this is no big deal, but I though it was a great accomplishment! 

 I know I have written a LOT about this guy today, and there are so many people in my life that I have learned so much from, but this is what God laid on my heart to write.  I hope you heard my heart as I wrote these things.  I know J is not perfect.  I know he has his imperfections, but he is also very inspirational in my life and God is using this little fella in a HUGE way to show God's love, grace, and power to SO many people!

 Thank you Lord for letting me know this J-man and his family!

Our last 6 and a 1/2

Our last six and a half birthday has finally arrived!  Happy 6 1/2 to our sweet S girl!  Why in the world would we celebrate 6 1/2 you may ask?  Well let me tell you a little story...

It begins in March/April of 2006...we had just picked up a wild little foster girl and were trying to wrap our minds around how to do the whole parent thing.  In the middle of getting clothes, hygeine products, enrolled in school, and getting to know the new person living in our home, we were exhausted and overwhelmed as we constantly tried to figure this girl out, explore her past and determine her needs for the present and future.  Our feisty little M needed the two to one ratio our home allowed at the time.  She was 6 at the time and woke up one morning saying she was 7.  That was it, she just decided she was 7.  So, we spent the next few days figuring out when her birthday was and when they entered the dhs system and so on (yes, it seems this would take one phone call, but it took several days...that's a whole different story).  While talking to the workers to figure everything out, M's worker started laughing and said, "Oh..that's funny!  M was removed from the home ON her birthday!"
There are some wonderful dhs workers, and we have had several workers who go beyond their job.  This was NOT one of those.  No, miss worker lady, it is NOT funny that a child was torn away from everything they know on their birthday!  That is not funny at all!!!  And, on top of it, this worker wasn't even right.  M was removed a couple of days BEFORE her birthday, which meant she spent her 6th birthday in a shelter, sleeping in separate quarters from her sisters, and being woke up in the night to comfort her sisters because they could not be comforted by staff.  Don't get me wrong.  I do not want to paint a terrible picture of the shelter.  This shelter is a really big one in the city and I'm sure they were packed.  They did not mean to ignore her birthday, but it just went unrecognized.  They are just trying to take care of basic needs, so things like birthdays might go unrecognized, and maybe they try to celebrate birthdays when they can (I know our local shelter does), but they just missed M's.  And as far as we can tell, the girls had no significant celebration of birthdays, which is the total opposite of how we were raised, so it just made us so sad!  No wonder M just woke up and decided she was 7, that's what happened when she turned 6.  She woke up one day and someone said she was 6!  Unlike the worker, it bothered us so much.  We were unsure that we would have her when she turned 7...I remember how distant 7 seemed!  My goodness, getting through one day was such an accomplishment, and we were preparing M to go back home soon, so the possibility of having her til she was 7 seemed so unrealistic to me!  It is pretty funny to think of now...we are planning her 12th, yes 12th birthday!  But at the time, 7 seemed so so far away, so we planned a 6 1/2 party!  Our friend RaeAnn's actual birthday was about that time, and we were visiting her, so we had a party, got a cake and had a little party, with our family and hers.  M loved it, and in our minds, that might be the last celebration she would get, BOY were we EVER WRONG!!!  Six months later, we celebrated her 7th birthday with a royal princess party (shared with her uncle Jarrod, yes he had a princess party)!  Six months later, with three extra kids, M remembered that it would be her 7 1/2 birthday!  We realized right then that this little situation was going to be pretty long term, and that would be a LOT of half birthdays to keep up with, so we better just stick to 6 1/2. 

And there you go...we now celebrate every one's 6 1/2 birthday.  One of the girls came home from school one day very sad that her friend didn't get anything for her 6 1/2 birthday...sorry parents if we caused any trouble there!

 And that brings us to our smiley S.  We got her when she was 2 1/2ish and I just can't believe we are already celebrating her 6 1/2...our LAST 6 1/2!!!  Maybe I will convince Bethany to let us do 6 1/2 for B, my nephew!

You might think that being the baby of 4 girls, S would be dependent and used to being bossed around by sisters.  Think again!  S is one independent girl and can boss with the best of them!  She loves to help people and seriously makes people smile when she smiles at them.  She is smart.  She sees needs and tends to them.  She is loving and sweet and let me tell you, she can hold her own against pretty much anyone!  Just a piece of advice, don't mess with S's sisters...she will come after you!!!  Happy 6 1/2 sweet S!!! 

Just that kind of day

I've noticed that I have put only stories with no pictures, so I decided to put a few pictures up to enjoy admist my stories.


Our days are full of ups and downs. I am trying hard to be more calm during the meltdowns, but I fail often. However, when I am actually calm during a meltdown, there can be some humor in it. We have to see the humor in all sorts of situations or we could go crazy around here! A few weeks ago, S was having a meltdown in the car about something...I have no idea what the fit was about, but it led to this:

S: I don't like this day!!!!

Us: Sorry...

S: It's an UGLY day!!!

Us: Sorry

S: This is an S-word day!!!

That's right...it was an s-word day! Sorry about having a stupid day S! We laughed and made the best of the situation. Hope you have a great day!

19 years ago...

Wow...19 years seems like a really long time. Truth is...it IS. When a person is at a job for 19 years, it is a big deal. When a person lives in a home for 19 years, it is a big deal. My 19 years....my mom has been gone for 19 years. Wow...19 years! That's a long time. While last year I felt the sharp pain on the anniversary of her death, this year the pain is in a different way. Let me see if I can explain this.

Last year, I missed my mother. I wanted to spend time with her. I wanted to hear her laugh. I wanted to taste her cooking (cause she really did cook so good). I wanted to do something crafty with her. I wanted to play with her hair. Get the idea? I wanted to just be with her. While I still dearly want those things this year, it seems to be a bit different. This year...I want her to bake cookies with my girls. I want my girls to rub her feet. I want her to pick out presents for my girls. I want my girls to call her on her birthday and sing to her. I want her to sing all of the fun kids songs to the girls.

I am so so truly blessed with my stepmom, aunts, and so many friends who fill many parts of the role of my mom and especially in regards to my girls, but I miss having HER fill that role. No one can do things like her. I miss that. My heart hurts...it really does.

But I think about what the Lord did on this day several years ago (I wrote about it last year on September 23), and I KNOW and REJOICE in the undeniable fact that God has made new life. He has restored this once gloomy day and made it a day of new life. God has given me so many blessings in my life. So many. One of the things that many people say to Autumn and I all the time is "Wow...I am so glad you took these girls, I just don't know where they would be without you."

I never know how to take that. I never know how to respond. Part of me thinks, "Man, I know...where would they be if they were still in that situation." Then the other part thinks, "Are you kidding? Autumn and I make so many mistakes!" Then, I realize what the truth of the statement is...."WOW...where would these girls be without the Lord rescuing them from the terrible awful place and restoring them anew."

What a beautiful picture of what the Lord CAN do for us all, if we choose. He takes us from our dirty sin and restores us and makes us new. I am amazed when I look at my girls and see this tangible picture of God's restoration. Because, these girls weren't just saved and now they are doing just ok...they have overcome so many things, risen above them, and are now using those same terrible experiences to minister to others. Just this week at the dinner table, the girls brought up the fact that a lot of kids often ask them about their past. I asked them how they handled it, and I had nothing really to add except for encouragement. They were handling it the right way! Thank you Lord!

Anyway...I know I have rambled on and on, but my point being, that on this day that I specifically remember the worst day of my life, I also rejoice in God's grace and mercy. I rejoice in the fact that he makes things new.

Oh...and the pictures were taken over a year ago, but I love them. Each girl got something of my mother's to take her picture with ....LOVE them!!!!!