Our last 6 and a 1/2

Our last six and a half birthday has finally arrived!  Happy 6 1/2 to our sweet S girl!  Why in the world would we celebrate 6 1/2 you may ask?  Well let me tell you a little story...

It begins in March/April of 2006...we had just picked up a wild little foster girl and were trying to wrap our minds around how to do the whole parent thing.  In the middle of getting clothes, hygeine products, enrolled in school, and getting to know the new person living in our home, we were exhausted and overwhelmed as we constantly tried to figure this girl out, explore her past and determine her needs for the present and future.  Our feisty little M needed the two to one ratio our home allowed at the time.  She was 6 at the time and woke up one morning saying she was 7.  That was it, she just decided she was 7.  So, we spent the next few days figuring out when her birthday was and when they entered the dhs system and so on (yes, it seems this would take one phone call, but it took several days...that's a whole different story).  While talking to the workers to figure everything out, M's worker started laughing and said, "Oh..that's funny!  M was removed from the home ON her birthday!"
There are some wonderful dhs workers, and we have had several workers who go beyond their job.  This was NOT one of those.  No, miss worker lady, it is NOT funny that a child was torn away from everything they know on their birthday!  That is not funny at all!!!  And, on top of it, this worker wasn't even right.  M was removed a couple of days BEFORE her birthday, which meant she spent her 6th birthday in a shelter, sleeping in separate quarters from her sisters, and being woke up in the night to comfort her sisters because they could not be comforted by staff.  Don't get me wrong.  I do not want to paint a terrible picture of the shelter.  This shelter is a really big one in the city and I'm sure they were packed.  They did not mean to ignore her birthday, but it just went unrecognized.  They are just trying to take care of basic needs, so things like birthdays might go unrecognized, and maybe they try to celebrate birthdays when they can (I know our local shelter does), but they just missed M's.  And as far as we can tell, the girls had no significant celebration of birthdays, which is the total opposite of how we were raised, so it just made us so sad!  No wonder M just woke up and decided she was 7, that's what happened when she turned 6.  She woke up one day and someone said she was 6!  Unlike the worker, it bothered us so much.  We were unsure that we would have her when she turned 7...I remember how distant 7 seemed!  My goodness, getting through one day was such an accomplishment, and we were preparing M to go back home soon, so the possibility of having her til she was 7 seemed so unrealistic to me!  It is pretty funny to think of now...we are planning her 12th, yes 12th birthday!  But at the time, 7 seemed so so far away, so we planned a 6 1/2 party!  Our friend RaeAnn's actual birthday was about that time, and we were visiting her, so we had a party, got a cake and had a little party, with our family and hers.  M loved it, and in our minds, that might be the last celebration she would get, BOY were we EVER WRONG!!!  Six months later, we celebrated her 7th birthday with a royal princess party (shared with her uncle Jarrod, yes he had a princess party)!  Six months later, with three extra kids, M remembered that it would be her 7 1/2 birthday!  We realized right then that this little situation was going to be pretty long term, and that would be a LOT of half birthdays to keep up with, so we better just stick to 6 1/2. 

And there you go...we now celebrate every one's 6 1/2 birthday.  One of the girls came home from school one day very sad that her friend didn't get anything for her 6 1/2 birthday...sorry parents if we caused any trouble there!

 And that brings us to our smiley S.  We got her when she was 2 1/2ish and I just can't believe we are already celebrating her 6 1/2...our LAST 6 1/2!!!  Maybe I will convince Bethany to let us do 6 1/2 for B, my nephew!

You might think that being the baby of 4 girls, S would be dependent and used to being bossed around by sisters.  Think again!  S is one independent girl and can boss with the best of them!  She loves to help people and seriously makes people smile when she smiles at them.  She is smart.  She sees needs and tends to them.  She is loving and sweet and let me tell you, she can hold her own against pretty much anyone!  Just a piece of advice, don't mess with S's sisters...she will come after you!!!  Happy 6 1/2 sweet S!!! 

Just that kind of day

I've noticed that I have put only stories with no pictures, so I decided to put a few pictures up to enjoy admist my stories.


Our days are full of ups and downs. I am trying hard to be more calm during the meltdowns, but I fail often. However, when I am actually calm during a meltdown, there can be some humor in it. We have to see the humor in all sorts of situations or we could go crazy around here! A few weeks ago, S was having a meltdown in the car about something...I have no idea what the fit was about, but it led to this:

S: I don't like this day!!!!

Us: Sorry...

S: It's an UGLY day!!!

Us: Sorry

S: This is an S-word day!!!

That's right...it was an s-word day! Sorry about having a stupid day S! We laughed and made the best of the situation. Hope you have a great day!

19 years ago...

Wow...19 years seems like a really long time. Truth is...it IS. When a person is at a job for 19 years, it is a big deal. When a person lives in a home for 19 years, it is a big deal. My 19 years....my mom has been gone for 19 years. Wow...19 years! That's a long time. While last year I felt the sharp pain on the anniversary of her death, this year the pain is in a different way. Let me see if I can explain this.

Last year, I missed my mother. I wanted to spend time with her. I wanted to hear her laugh. I wanted to taste her cooking (cause she really did cook so good). I wanted to do something crafty with her. I wanted to play with her hair. Get the idea? I wanted to just be with her. While I still dearly want those things this year, it seems to be a bit different. This year...I want her to bake cookies with my girls. I want my girls to rub her feet. I want her to pick out presents for my girls. I want my girls to call her on her birthday and sing to her. I want her to sing all of the fun kids songs to the girls.

I am so so truly blessed with my stepmom, aunts, and so many friends who fill many parts of the role of my mom and especially in regards to my girls, but I miss having HER fill that role. No one can do things like her. I miss that. My heart hurts...it really does.

But I think about what the Lord did on this day several years ago (I wrote about it last year on September 23), and I KNOW and REJOICE in the undeniable fact that God has made new life. He has restored this once gloomy day and made it a day of new life. God has given me so many blessings in my life. So many. One of the things that many people say to Autumn and I all the time is "Wow...I am so glad you took these girls, I just don't know where they would be without you."

I never know how to take that. I never know how to respond. Part of me thinks, "Man, I know...where would they be if they were still in that situation." Then the other part thinks, "Are you kidding? Autumn and I make so many mistakes!" Then, I realize what the truth of the statement is...."WOW...where would these girls be without the Lord rescuing them from the terrible awful place and restoring them anew."

What a beautiful picture of what the Lord CAN do for us all, if we choose. He takes us from our dirty sin and restores us and makes us new. I am amazed when I look at my girls and see this tangible picture of God's restoration. Because, these girls weren't just saved and now they are doing just ok...they have overcome so many things, risen above them, and are now using those same terrible experiences to minister to others. Just this week at the dinner table, the girls brought up the fact that a lot of kids often ask them about their past. I asked them how they handled it, and I had nothing really to add except for encouragement. They were handling it the right way! Thank you Lord!

Anyway...I know I have rambled on and on, but my point being, that on this day that I specifically remember the worst day of my life, I also rejoice in God's grace and mercy. I rejoice in the fact that he makes things new.

Oh...and the pictures were taken over a year ago, but I love them. Each girl got something of my mother's to take her picture with ....LOVE them!!!!!

A Tinsley Girl's Thoughts on Football

I love football season. Cool air. The whole town showing up to support the team. Cheering fans. The band playing. Visiting with all of my friends. Cheerleaders with their hair perfectly done cheering their heart out. Food from the concession stand. Oh yeah, there's a game too right? I like the game too, but I can't always understand what is going on, but don't worry, I just stand and cheer when everyone else does! Well, as you can see, I'm not as into the game, but I love football season. Unfortunately, our girls have taken after us and don't know a ton about any sports, although they do now know the correct name of the sport we are going to see...most of the time. While most families have Superbowl parties, our female family gears up for a Miss America party! With all of this said, I will share with you A's thoughts on football.

Remember, A is the girl that asks a million questions about anything...really...a million. You can just see the wheels turning in her eyes, and I love to see the world through her perspective. As this one-of-a-kind girl sits and watches a football game, the wrinkle of her eyebrows totally gives it away...she does NOT see any reason at all why someone would actually CHOOSE to play football. "Why do all of those boys just run around on the grass and hit each other? Are they mad at each other?" It just does not make sense to her. The more she watches, the more she doesn't understand..."I just don't know why they want to get hit...or hit each other!" Me either A...I don't get it either!

Don't get me wrong, she loves to go to the game, although the concession stand takes priority over the game anytime! A conversation we had while watching a game:

A: Do girls play football?

Me: Well, a few have, but they don't usually.

A: How come? They aren't mad enough?

Me: Well, I guess it's just a rough game and they don't really want to...I'm not sure

A: Well it would be a better game if girls played.

Me: Oh yeah?

A: Yep. Girls would make it better.

Me: How so?

A: Well girls can't throw as far, so those guys wouldn't have to run as far to go get the ball. See...now they have to run all the way to the end of grass, but if girls threw the ball they wouldn't have to run as far. And girls don't hit as hard, so they wouldn't get hurt!

Makes perfect sense to me my little frog girl....perfect sense!

One Saturday evening we didn't have a lot going on, so the girls went to the living room and turned on "Anne of Green Gables" (one of my all time favorite movies). I, however, decided that I would turn on the big football game since the rest of my state would be talking about the game the next day. A came with me to my room to watch the game. Well, watch is a rather loose term in this case. The game was on...I was editing photos while kind of listening to the game and looking up every once in a while. A was watching the game and again, talking about how little sense it makes for all of those boys to hit each other all the time.

A: Trin, I think that guy is hurt.

Me: (still not paying a lot of attention) hmmm...

A: Is he? Is he hurt?

I look up at the TV and don't see anyone hurt.

Me: I don't think so...I think everyone is fine.

A: I think that guy hurt his hand! Did he break his hand?

Me: I really don't think so.

A: (She is really worried now and getting very persistent to solve this mystery) But that man said it...that man said they guy broke his hand!

Me: Well they aren't showing it..let me rewind it and see.

A: That man said it, I KNOW he did!

Me: Okay, what exactly did he say?

A: He said, (in her best announcer voice) "And he took the hand off"

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! Poor girl...I laughed so hard before I could explain to her that taking the hand off had nothing to do with breaking his body at all! Oh I love her perspective! Needless to say, I do NOT think I have a football fanatic on my hands!

I forgot how to do this...

So I'm not going to make a whole post about all the reasons why I haven't posted in over a month. All of the excuses just sound like excuses because that is exactly what they are, so I am going to just start posting and try and catch up with all of the news and stories that have happened since I last posted. As you can probably tell, I am an avoider. If something feels overwhelming, I avoid it. That is why I haven't posted, and that is also why my laundry piles up and my house is a mess...how's that for honesty? HA!!





On to the story. On Sunday we found out that one of A's classmates was in the hospital with asthma (she is now in the children's hospital ICU...pray for her please!!!), so I decided to drop off Autumn and the other 3 girls at home after church, and A, A's friend O and I went to visit her in the hospital. We of course had to stop for lunch, so we dined at Wendy's. We don't get the chance to just take one sister out at a time, so it is a fun treat when we do, even if it is with a friend! As the three of us ate, I noticed two policemen in full uniform were also eating with what seemed to be one of the men's wife and son. When the policemen finished their meal and passed by our table on their way out the door, I noticed A's eyes grow wide and I could just see the wheels turning in her head. To my surprise, she was silent as they passed by the table and out the door. Just as I thought she wasn't going to make any kind of comment or ask a question about the police, she looked straight at me and stated matter-of-factly, "Well, what are you going to do?"


Me: What?


Her: Well, aren't you going to do something?


Me: About what?


Her: Those polices just came by and TOOK that kid with them!!! You can't just go around taking kids! You have to do something! I almost jumped on them!

Oh my goodness...can you imagine if she really jumped on the police? I mean really, what would I do? How in the world would I explain....I'm sorry officer that my daughter just burst out of her seat and attacked you like a wild animal, she thought you were stealing this darling child that seems to be your son...oops! Yeah, I don't think that would go over too well. I could see the lightbulb go on in her head when I explained that the child with the officer was probably in fact his son. She had never thought of that. She said, "I didn't know polices had a wife and kids."

Her eye for detail amazes me. The girl went on to describe the men, boy and lady in complete detail. She definitely could have drawn them or described them if we needed to catch them. I thought about that incident all day long. It was just so strange to me that it would bother A enough to remember exactly what they looked like and to want to jump on them and want me to do something about the police. I couldn't figure out what that girl was thinking...it bothered me.

That evening I talked to A again about what had happened at lunch that day. That's when it all came clear.
Me: "What did you want me to do for that little boy today?"
A: "I wanted you to find a home for him."

GOT IT! This whole time I thought that A thought the police were stealing that boy. That's not at all what she thought. You see, she associates children with police meaning that the children are being taken from their home and put into foster care. She wanted me to find a home for that little boy. She wanted to jump on them I guess because it stirred up so much emotion in her that she could just explode.

Wow....

My girls have been through awful things. They have been through traumatic situations. They have chosen to use their experiences to help others.

Wow....

What an example! We all have big issues we have faced. We all have things that have been difficult in our lives. What will we do with those things? Do we choose to sit and just let life pass us by, or will we choose to jump on it (but not on people!) and use the bad things to help others! Thank you Lord that you can use any and all things to bring Glory to YOUR name!





I sweetly (ok maybe I was laughing) suggested to A that the boy was probably one of the men's son and they were probably just having lunch together. That had never occured to her! Poor girl can walk into a room and notice the teeny tiniest detail and totally miss the obvious!!! After giving a short lecture about how inappropriate it is to jump on people when you think they are wrong, or jump on anyone for any occasion really.

60 Candles

Happy Birthday Dad!!! I can NOT believe you are 60!
So...in honor of dad's 60 candles and 60 years of life, the girls and I have come up with 60 reasons we love dad/grandpa, or just some fun memories! It will be long....enjoy!

These are in no order, and I had the girls write them down on their own, so I kept their spelling on them.

1. He helped me when I fell down.--S


2. He taught me how to do the puzzle--M


3. I love his movies about Popeye and Betty Boop--H


4. He lovs God--A


5. He is the same at home as he is in public--Trin


6. He dances funny--H


7. He holds the door--M


8. He let us sleep in the tent--S


9. He gives good advice--Autumn


10. He has cool moves--M


11. He has a good and prity bathroom--A


12. He does fantsy dinners--H


13. He is a good cook--A


14. He is funny--S


15. He seeks the Lord--Trin


16. He has good reasons and lessons--H


17. He is healthy--M


18. He does great planning--M


19. He has very good manners--M


20. He gets the dogs when they bark at us--H


21. He is fair--Trin


22. He is trustworthy--Autumn


23. He is vary good at playing his gootar--A


24. He is strong--M


25. He tells funny jokes--A


26. He loves to watch tv with us--H


27. He plays watergun fights with us--H


28. He makes the best hot dogs--A


29. He is a great husband--M


30. He is a great deacon--M Am I really only half way done???


31. He helps us cook breakfast--S (he always makes a good breakfast--me)


32. He lets us watch a lot ov tv--A


33. He lets us sleep in a tent--H


34. He tells jokes--M (I never get them)


35. He plays with me--M


36. He let us ride one of the busses--M


37. He is a cool grandpal--H


38. He is fun to swim with--H


39. I love the thangs abot him--A


40. He has a funy mined--A


41. He cooks good hot dogs--M


42. He cooks good smors--M


43. He has good movies at his house like Betty Boo and popeye...I like her hair down--S


44. He is a good teacher--M


45. He is the best grampa--M


46. He lives what he preaches--Trin


47. He has funy nabers--A


48. He has funny jokes--H


49. He is nice--H


50. He lets us ride the bus--H


51. He is a good cook--H


52. He is fun to play with--H


53. He is fun an grate--A


54. He has good food--A


55. He is a great person--M


56. He helps me--M


57. He loves me--M


58. He cooked hot dogs--S


59. He is a great person--M


60. WE LOVE HAVING HIM AS OUR DAD AND GRANDPA!!!!!--All of the girls

We love you and hope you have a GREAT birthday!!!!!!

How do you spell that?

Autumn and I are pretty much opposites in most ways possible. I mean, we have the same core values, but other than that, we are completely different. I'm outgoing and get energy from a crowd of people, she is an introvert and would rather just have a one-on-one conversation. I am creative, she is logical. I am more emotional, she is even-tempered. I am dramatic, she is calm. Get the picture? It is really funny because for a long time, we if there were chores to do or in getting food, we would each think of what we would like to do/eat/get, and then we would leave that one for the other person, thinking we were doing them a favor, but we both like opposite things, so turns out both of us would get our least favorite thinking we were doing the other one a favor! Like taking a cookie....I like the soft chewy ones, so I might take the kind of burnt one thinking I was leaving Autumn the best, but it turns out I took her favorite. That used to happen all the time, but we have learned that pretty much on everything, we like total opposite things. Pretty funny. Autumn is smart and usually right. I am not dumb at all, don't get me wrong, but I do not remember facts, and I care way more about people and experiences than tasks and facts, so she is right most of the time. I am a little spacier than she is, which is why I MUST share this story. There aren't a ton of ditzy moments for Autumn, so I just have to share this one.
Flash back to high school...1994 I think. Autumn was a sophomore I think when this happened. When I have a question, I am NOT afraid to ask. When I need help, I am NOT afraid to ask. When I mess up or goof up, I am usually much louder about it than I really need to be. Again, Autumn is the complete opposite. If she has a question, she tries to research or use logic to figure it out. You get the idea. Autumn was in science class and got put in the lab group with two boys, so she had the responsibility of writing the lab report for the group, which meant she had to write every one's names down.
So there she was, sitting in the science lab with a dilemma: what in the world are these guys' names? Now, I would have just asked. I would have said, "Oops, sorry I totally forgot your name even though you told me a million times". Not Autumn. She came up with a much more clever plan. So.....she asked how to SPELL their names. Great plan, EXCEPT for the fact that the one guy answered, "P-A-T"
Hahahahahaha!!!!! It makes me laugh just writing about it. I mean really, how many ways can you spell Pat? Hahahahaha!! Good one Autumn!