Bible Stories: our version

We had a fun and relaxing (lazy) day after a busy week and we topped the day off with an evening at our friend Becky's house. Skip grilled while we swam, then we all enjoyed the yummy food together. On our way home, A shared some of the Bible stories she has learned. I think it started out with a story from VBS, but it turned out to be her summary of the Bible, and our entertainment for the night!
Creation:
When that man God made first was runnin' around, he started naming those animals. But he got the rabbit and fox confused and called the rabbit a fox and the fox a rabbit. Then the servant had legs but they brought that fire cross out, I mean the sword and threw it on the ground but the servant had legs, but God made it not have legs and crawl on the ground.
H: It's SERMON, not servant!
Me: No, it's serpent.
A: Ok, well the servant (her and Autumn argued about that a minute) had to crawl on the ground with no legs.
Good Samaritan:
There were those two mean men and they saw the good guy walkin' so they hit him and took all of his clothes. He was hurt real bad so the shepherd came by (she knew it was the shepherd cause he looked like a shepherd because of his shepherd clothes). The shepherd wrapped him up in sticks and that wrapping stuff and took him to a dungeon because he was hurt.
Noah:
Noah was the one who was on that big ship, and there was a deer that got hit by the storm and he died. But he took some people on that ship so they were ok. He sent out that crow and he was afraid of the water so he came back, so then Noah sent out that white bird and he did good.
Jonah:
Jonah told those other men to throw him in the water and they did cause he didn't do what God wanted so God sent a big blue fish to come and eat him for a lot of days. Then after I don't know how many days, that fish shot him out of his mouth and he was okay.
Joseph:
Joseph got a nice coat that had a lot of colors on it and he got it from his dad, but his brothers didn't like it so they threw him in a big pit to die. But someone came by with a stick to get him out, but they weren't very nice to him with that stick.
David and Goliath:
There was an army of Samaritans and they didn't like the people from Samaria, so they went to fight them every day. They said one two three four every day, but no one wanted to fight because they were real sholdiers (soldiers). But then that boy came out to fight the big guy (later she called him the giant) and he put a rock in it and swung it 15 times then it went and killed him down.
Daniel and the Lions:
Daniel wouldn't pray to anyone but God so they put him in that hole. The mean guys put him in that hole, not his brothers. The mean guys didn't want him to pray to God. Then the lions were there and they were nice to him because God made the big lion nice and the big lion told the other lions to be nice. So they were nice to Daniel and when Daniel left, they were mean again because they were hungry.
The fiery furnace:
Those three guys wouldn't do what the king wanted because the king wasn't doing what God wanted, so they put them in the fire and God kept them safe. They all died but the angel brought them back to life and saved them. And they didn't get poked or bruises or anything!

Okay, so we have some work, but she is on her way......just a little confusion!!! It was SO funny!!!